≡ Menu

FMF: Surrender

Surrender is the word for today’s Five-Minute Friday linkup. And though my blog is nowhere near ready to go I am surrendering it to all the hints the Lord has been less and less subtly dropping. So, timer set, here we go:

The first thing that came to my mind when I saw this prompt was “I Surrender All,” one of my favorite hymns and a dangerous one. To my mind, if you sing that song, you’d best think about the words and mean them.

I want to write. Need to write. Have to write. The problem is that I’ve been fighting the Lord about my topic. He has been rather insistent of late that it’s fine if I write about faith and fitness but my focus needs to be on marriage.

I don’t want to write about marriage. Mine is difficult and trying (it’s my second, entered into 4 years after my first husband’s death) and there’s hardly a day I wouldn’t rather just run away.

Last May, though, I surrendered to doing what the Lord wanted me to do. I was all set to move out, bags packed and a place to go, when my husband asked me to just stay through the summer to see if we could find some common ground on which to build. I prayed about and I knew that the Lord was telling me “Yes, Shelby, stay.” So I have.

I have been rebellious. For several months I was mindful of being as Christ-like as possible in interactions with my husband, being a biblical wife. The last couple of months, though, rebellion and resentment have crept in.

Everywhere I go, I am reminded of Jesus’ character, his teachings to love and to turn the other cheek. I’m reminded that my need to write is God-given and that I should use that gift to the purpose GOD has for me and not what I want for myself.

So I surrender. I’ll write faith and fitness but focus my writing on being the wife God calls me to be.

This blog is His, after all.